So, I am pretty sure I am officially out of my funk. Thank gaud, right? I got connected with some people participating in a self-organized, urban pub crawl. Wondering what a pub crawl is? I was when I happened upon them. What they decided to do was go to an area they knew had a lot of bars. Walk to the end of that street, cross over and walk back up. All the while, stopping into every single bar and ordering at least one beer. If the place is lame, you suck down your beer as quick as possible and move to the next one. If it’s a nice place, you may consider having more than one belt before going to the next watering hole. I thought this sounded like a lot of fun–getting sloppy with a bunch of complete strangers. The only hitch was that we went to a lot of way crappy bars. I think I took down 6 beers in no more than thirty minutes. My limit is usually two beers per hour. Needless to say, I was tossed. Not in an unfun, unmanageable way though. But instead, I was drunk in a rowdy and fun sort.
I made friends with nearly every bartender and got free drinks. I actually got a bartender to give me a free pitcher for going in the back room and letting him watch me masturbate. Talk about a win-win situation for me!
By the end of the night I was literally crawling from pub to pub. So, pub crawl is a good name for the event.
At the end of the evening I crawl into a cab, knocked on my neighbor’s door, and crawled into his bed. After all that drinking, I needed to do something to work it off–or someone. We didn’t do anything especially nasty. Just a couple times with me on top and a handful of times of plain, old missionary style. Sometimes that is just the way to go, especially when you are too drunk to hold up your own head.
Anyway, I need an aspirin, water, and desperately need to get some sleep. Come over if you want to rub my shoulders.

God! I have been so lazy and tired lately. I don’t know what’s gotten into me—or out of me.
I wake up around 10am and sit around in my skivvies until noon. I eat half a grapefruit and all I want to do is watch daytime television.
I haven’t been fingering myself. I have not seen my rabbit in days. And what’s worse, I haven’t even felt like looking at porno. I always want to look at porno!!
It seems like I’ve lost my zeal, my zest. I’m such a self-sufficient girl (if you know what I mean). Maybe that’s my problem. I am so used to doing for and just plain doing myself. I must be tired of it.
So that leaves me to beg the question, who’s going to come over and help me “take care of things” around the house? Don’t be shy!

Most of you have probably never played this game, but it is a board game that my generation’s young girls played. There are dares and truth-revealing questions. If you refuse to perform an act or answer a question, you have to wear a zit sticker. At the time, that seemed like the most devastating thing in the world. My friends and I realized that this is not quite as dire as grown ups. Also, we found the game itself to be a bit of a snore.
We decided to call over boys and make the night co-ed. As well, we rounded up some hooch. The boys served to help with the dares and the hooch replaced the silly zit stickers.
When the evening first started we were doing the standard find out who’s fucking whom. Who would LIKE to be fucking whom? There was walking outside naked and minor kissing and petting. I will tell you, the dares got far more inventive and questions more intrusive with boys and booze involved. Masha had to give Dave a lap dance. Lizelle had to do a shot of tequila, but licking salt off Dan’s dick. I had to act out and explicit doggy style sex scene (note to self: not as fun without a partner). We found out multiple women in the room LOVE anal sex AND the oddest places some have had sex. Oh another thing I had to do was put on a blindfold and see if I could guess who was sitting in front of me by putting his dick in my mouth. Completely juvenile, I know. I guessed Erik and was right. I kind of have the oral equivalent of a photographic memory. Ha ha!
We got so drunk. It was wild and a lot of fun. I am looking forward to having another night like that if anyone is interested.

I am not sure if you noticed, but I masturbate A LOT. Sometimes I think I do it too much. Can there be too much? If so, what is that limit? Sometimes I wonder if I should go on a masturbation hiatus.
These are questions I ask myself daily. Sometimes I think I have reached the too much mark when I get a cramp in my hand in the middle of the day and I have yet to reach my getting off quota for that day. Sometimes I switch hands. It’s like being touched by a stranger, which is sometimes exciting, but usually it’s just not the same.
It’s always a bummer to have to choose between ergonomic health and libido health. That’s why I am thinking that it’s time to take a break.
Am I being rational or irrational? Is this an idea that makes sense? Or, is it totally ridiculous.
I’m going to ponder this over the next few weeks. So, if I do decide to go with this I will have to have people come over to do the work for me. I’m still human and I still need a certain number of orgasms. Either that or I will just need to go out and buy new toys.
I wonder if I can write that off as a business expense?

What an unusual day. I did absolutely nothing. I needed to clean. I had laundry to do. You know, boring stuff.
I decided none of that stuff interested me. I stayed in bed until 10am. I love giving myself days off from the world. When I finally go out of bed I, made oolong tea and sat on the couch to watch soap operas. I find the drama intriguing and the young, wealthy people so stimulating. Soap operas are kind of like day-time soft core porn. Young people with money bullying each other, sleeping with everyone, and performing cut throat business transactions. Oh it’s all too fabulous. It’s the perfect back drop to masturbating like crazy. I make a game out of it. While watching young and the restless, I use my vibrator every time Gloria double crosses someone. I use my hand whenever Drusilla does something crazy that jeopardizes her marriage. When Victor yells, I use one of my assorted Dildos. Then when there is suspected in fidelity, I go for the all hand no penetration job.
I have a similar drill for the other soaps during the day.
Oh day time television.
I may only have one life to live, but as long as I’m the bold and the beautiful, I will pleasure myself for all the days of our lives, other wise I’ll be one of the young and the restless and have to go to the general hospital. … I could go one like that forever if allowed to.

Do any of you watch House?
I love that show. Sometimes I fantasize that I am on that show. A patient with random, seemigly unrelated symptoms. However, House has a hunch–Aphasia? Lichen Simplex Chronicus? No–he’s wrong. He gets frustrated. Whatever is worng with me is serious and he is running out of time. My life is slipping through is fingers and he can’t figure out what is the matter. What does he do. He stops and you see realization glaze over his eyes. He walks over to the bed. In a haste, he cuts off my hospital gown with such determination as in a life or death situation. Then with the same haste and look of determination, he tears off his shirt and I frantically remove his pants? All the while his stethiscope is pressed against my chest. As he penetrates me with his larger than life cock, I can hear my own heart rate accelerate. My heart pounds faster and harder as he does.I’m sweaty. I feel like I’m close to death. Everything is turning dark. Then, I cum! I feel my heart rate slow to normal. My vision returns. My fever, if any goes down. I can walk again. I have a new vest for life. The doctor’s from his team come in and ask how e cured me. And his response is, I had a feeling and went with it. Then, everyone watches in awe as he exits the room. The camera flashes back to me and I have stars in my eyes. Credits roll. the end.
It ma sound crazy, but after every episode I have a different ending. And my that, I mean he attacks the problem from a different end. ::wink:wink::

My friend told me he was making “hippy joes” and I needed to come over. The name of the item being made intrigued me, so I went over. Apparently, “hippy joes” are meatless sloppy joes. Who knew? I will say that they were quite delicious. Though, I couldn’t let Dave know that.
I flung a little hippy joe into his face. HE flung a lot into mine. After a few brief moments, we were both covered in beans and fake meat. It was ridiculous.
Needing to wash up and in an effort to conserve water, we decided to shower together. It was a selfless act to save the planet. Luckily selfless conservation wasn’t the only thing he had in mind. After we cleaned up, things got a little dirty. My friend is a skinny thing, so I was surprised that he was able to hold me up for so long!
After we fucked in the shower, we decided to clean the kitchen. I gave him a blow job, while he wiped down counters. We decided his bedroom was dirty. We decided not to clean it up, but to make it dirtier. Rim jobs for all. ha.
I’d say it was quite a productive night. Though, after all that we did I needed to take a shower when I go home.

I was not in the mood to do a lot on this holiday. I work very hard at finding dirty deed and naughty pleasure every day of the year. I decided on Monday I would let them find me.
I went with my friend and her brother to a BBQ. I didn’t know anyone, but the weather was nice. I was all about comfort. It was a no panties, no bra day for sure. I wore my hair in a messy ponytail, tight cotton tank, velour shorts and sandals. I was 100% comfortable. Sometimes I can feel so much hotter without the burden of crotch less underwear and spiked heels, you know?
Anyway, after burgers and beers the party started to die down. I decided to take advantage of the good weather and get some sun. I hate tan lines, though. Everyone seemed fine with me sunning nude. One thing I am a stickler for is sun block. I got my friend to help me apply. I’m not sure who brought the camera, but there were pictures taken of her rubbing lotion on my tits. She is so silly. She started tickling me. I spanked her for being naughty. I really need to see those pictures. It was so much fun rolling around with a good friend. I realized that some of the guys were really into this. I whispered in her ear that we should have some fun with this. I took whipped cream and put some on my nipple and a line down to my pelvis. My friend SLOWLY licked the cream off my tits, then the trail of cream down my stomach. She stopped right at my pussy. Everyone was watching with anticipation. She stopped and walked away like nothing happened. I have never seen so many gaping open jaws.
I must admit though, I was a little riled up. I went into the bathroom with my bullet, to finish what we had started.
Not only did I forget to lock the door. I didn’t shut it all the way. Some guy walked in on me masturbating with my miniature vibrator. I was almost embarrassed, until I noticed how hard he was. I grabbed him. He shut and locked the door. He bent me forward over the vanity, held my hands behind my back and went to town. Not only did he help me finish what I had started, but he got me to cum 5 times.
I told him he should do porno. Isn’t it just like me, on a lazy holiday I’m still thinking about business?

Hello fabulous people looking at my fabulous diary. I was thinking about this the other day. I think I’m getting into a rut. I feel like I do the same thing everyday. Get up to my rabbit. This is my favorite part of the day. I sleep nude and in the morning I roll over and grab my favorite vibrator. Sometimes I think about Freddy Prince Jr. Other times I ponder The Rock. Sometimes I’ve been good. Usually, I’ve been bad. The Rabbit it great, because as it is pulsing in my pussy it is also tickling my clit. I love the sensation. I can feel my orgasm start in the tips of my toes, they start to tingle. Then, my legs go numb. If I weren’t horizontal at that point, I know my knees would buckle in that instance. While this is happening, my fingers, arms and head begin to feel light—the rabbit still in motion, pulsating. I’m beginning to involuntarily thrust my pelvis and squeeze. Reflex, I suppose. I feel my abs tighten. I start to perspire. I feel my heart pounding. I also feel the blood rush to my face. For one split second I feel absolutely nothing. I would imagine it is what one would feel like in the eye of a storm. An eerie nothingness and in almost the same instant everything crashes around. I exploded. I yell: “OH GOD!” My heart feels like my chest is too small to contain it. At this point I am tearing at the sheets. I feel like I’ve jumped out of a plane, the exhilaration of seeing the earth fly toward you. Sometimes, I am cumming so intensely that I throw myself off of the bed.
Is it bad that I turn on my sex toys before I turn on the coffee pot? An orgasm before bed is better than any espresso I’ve ever had.